FullyClothedMen

"What's Up, Doc?"

Man walks into a Psychiatrist's office. They greet and both sit down.

Doc: So, your reports are pretty vague, What excatly is your problem?

Man: Well, it 's kind of complicated, but I'll try. Let's see. Where should I start? Oh, well, I guess you could call it anxiety, but--…

Doc: Do you feel anxious a lot, like you-

Man: Hey! Can't you see I'm trying to tell you here? Huh? I'm getting to it!

Doc: Okay, just calm down and tell me your problem.

Man: Thank you. Well, it's anxiety, but not really. It's the kind of thing where I'll be getting along with someone and everything, but then they'll do something that angers me so much I'll-

Doc: So, it's really more like an explosive temp-

Man: What? Did you hear me say I'm done? Was I finished? Did you see the little 'occupied' sign right here on my forehead turn to say 'vacant?' Do you see credits rolling up in front of my face? Do you see the words 'the end' anywhere? Huh? No; I didn't think so! So just sit there and pretend to listen until I finish. Okay? Okay?

Doc: Oka-

Man: Uh-

[Doc makes a 'calm down' hand gesture]

Man: So, I don't know where I get it from.

[They both sit there for awhile, until the man finally speaks.]

Man: What, I come here to pay to sit on your couch? Huh? Aren't you going to say anything? That is your job, isn't it?

Doc: I'm sorry, I wasn't sure if you were finished.

Man: Are you getting smart? [stands up] Huh? [walks over and gets in the doc's face] Don't get smart with me, 'cause I'll-

Doc: [stands up and pushes man away] Maybe it would be best if you left, Mr. Uh, [looks at the file] Smithie.

Man: Smithe! The 'e' is silent! You can't even get my name right? You're going to pay for this! [storms out]

Doc: [to himself] Phew. I'm glad that's over. [Secretary comes in]

Secretary: Dr. Weisenheimer, phone call on line one. I think it's your wife.

Doc: What? You just come right in? what ever happened to knocking? Huh? What do I even pay you for? Is there a sign out there that says just come right in? No knocking needed? Huh?

[Fade out]

 

 

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